The Beast

(Continued)

We got out at a dusty, nowhere junction outside Bahia Blanca and when, after not very long, another 50's Mercedes truck (like Luka's from two days earlier) with a big, round blue and white face came along I said:

"If a truck could be cute, then that's cute"

Usefully it stopped and Julio, a proper dude, took us to the fantastically named Hilario Ascasubi along with his 10-ball gearknob, giant handgun crucifix and extensive knife collection stuck into every surface of the cab.

We found a great camping spot relatively close to the road, but somehow invisible from it, at one corner of a wood.

I had finished the chess set which I'd been carving the past three nights, so after dinner on the hobo stove we had our first game of chess - followed by my first wild poo of the trip.

The stove had struggled as the wind had been blowing through the wood stronger than we'd expected - we tried to get an early night, but mosquitos and other freaky insects were non-stop once it was dark, and just when I was finally nearly drifting off an unusually persistent wild dog decided everyone on the continent should be informed of our presence.

None of the usual scare tactics were doing anything, and eventually after over an hour of constant, piercing barking he gave up.

After another hour or so thrashing and raging at a new wave of mosquitos an enormous noise came from the wood, probably fifty metres of so away.

It was like a demented cat being tortured through a megaphone, and Kev gently snored in reply.

Some minutes later the noise came again, twice as near.

My eyes were now fixed in the trees desperately and I spent who-knows-how-long staring at shadows and shapes in which I couldn't quite make out anything at all.

Just as I quietened my brain and shut my eyes a big tree branch snapped the tree I was sleeping next to and the noise of panicked breath and powerful claws scrabbling at bark settled into an uneasy silence.

Kev had woken up and went for the clap and shout approach, which was met with the single biggest hissing noise I have ever heard from two metres above my head.

He pointed his torch up and two big eyes in front of a bulky form appeared - as he thrashed his light around I jumped out of my bag and flapped as I did a wild hobo growl.

It jumped straight to the floor and ran back into the wood away from us.

"What the fuck was that?"

Monday, December 3, 2012

I woke up the next day and the variety of insects which had been so friendly all night had he interesting side-effect of making my whole top lip treble size - I talked funny, ate funny and dribbled when I drank. Thanks nature.

The next day the hitches were becoming shorter and more difficult to get - In the morning we got a lift with Mario and Lorenzo, a father and son who'd been out job-hunting for Lorenzo and once our poor Spanish was exhausted Mario promptly pulled out a small selection of photos from the glovebox to admire.

It turns out wild Pumas are a threat to livestock in this area (and are present throughout rural Argentina), and the photos were of Mario proudly posing with a fearsomely muscular specimen as long as Mario is tall.

Kevin and I looked at each other and didn't need to say a word - we knew this was what had stalked us from the trees the previous night, and that it was only scuppered by a weak branch giving it's position away.